The collar of the shirt is uncomfortably tight on Penny’s neck. She hasn’t worn it in almost a year now, since her last court appearance after the Johnny Moon fiasco, and she forgot how weird the shirt lays on her body. The sleeves are both too tight and too loose on her arms, her hair, in loose braids, feels weird on her scalp and the man behind her keeps breathing through his mouth. She kind of wants to run out of the room and breathe normal air, not sprayed with tons of perfumes, colognes and smell of old for a moment.
But she won’t.
For Elijah.
Elijah mentioned that his student recital was coming up about a week before the actual event, while they were hanging out in their usual place during free period. He didn’t make a big deal out of it, like any other kid who practiced for as long as he did would, but rather said like it was another day for him. Mischa looked at Penny, Penny looked at Mischa, and they immediately knew.
It’s good, to have another person that can understand you without words. After school, they started planning it for real. They found when and where the recital is after some digging on the St. Cassian’s Facebook page, and began the deeper research.
It took a lot of research, and having to ask Ricky and Constance’s parents and Noel’s mom, the only ones that come to their concerts, what they should wear, do, bring, say. In all honesty, they had no idea what to do – they only ever performed, and being in the audience felt weird after all this time.
Outfits. Nothing too formal, but not casual either. Elijah needs to feel it’s a special occasion.
Flowers! It was Ricky’s dad's first suggestion. Mischa and Penny went to their local florist at Mega Mall together and picked out a bouquet together. Alstroemeria for friendship, devotion, loyalty, pink Lilies for admiration, love, compassion, Lily of the Valley for joy, sincerity and luck, and blue Hydrangeas, solely because blue is Elijah’s favorite color. God bless the shop assistant who put up with them trying to decide for forty minutes.
Maybe some sweets? Constance’s mom offered. Penny bought two bags of sour gummy worms. Elijah’s favorites.
Don’t show up late. They were twenty minutes early, one of the first in the audience.
They didn’t tell Elijah about their appearance. Both of them decided they wanted it to be a surprise for him, and see his raw reaction.
They drove to the city hall, where the annual recital has been held for the last twenty years, in Mischa’s falling-apart car, and sneaked through the side door so Elijah wouldn’t see them.
And so they are. In official attire – Mischa, in a shirt he miraculously had and Noel’s black jacket, had to borrow pants from Ricky’s dad because his pant shelf consists of baggy jeans and sweatpants. Penny has a simple white shirt, light pink sweater and long, dark pink pleated skirt with glitter. Mischa is sitting next to her, bouquet in his lap, nervously picking at one of the leaves.
Lights dim suddenly, leaving only a yellowish tint and Penny's hand clasps on Mischa's wrist. He rubs her knuckles with his other hand soothingly.
Elijah walks onto the stage, violin in one hand, the other hanging around his pants' pocket. He's wearing dark pants, too long for him, the ends of them cuffed up and still dragging on the floor and a red flannel shirt. His hair is less messy than usual, though still keeping the glint of Real Elijah, the one they know the best. His eyes are low, looking at his feet.
The entire room is absolutely silent, except for the footsteps of kids walking and sitting down. They clearly rehearsed this a million times before. The moves are automatic, everyone knows their place in the three rows of chairs.
There are kids walking in front and behind Elijah, but Mischa and Penny focus only on him. He sits down in the first row, on the left side, legs twitching when he tries to make himself comfortable - Penny knows the town hall chairs aren't comfortable in the slightest, especially the folding ones the kids have to sit on - and he looks towards the audience. Probably searching for his parents.
Penny waves to him, and she's sure she will drown in the sea of other waving parents, some flashing their cameras and some scanding things like "pull your dress down McKenna!", the middle-aged mom with bleached blonde hair yells from the seat on Penny's left.
Elijah goes rigid.Penny sees his violin slip from his grip a little, and his mouth falls down just enough for his braces to flash. Like a deer in headlights.
His eyes light up first. The lighting he’s sitting in makes his face almost white, and his already dark eyes even darker. The surprise and happiness and childosj excitement coming back to his gaze are so palpable they make Penny’s heart hurt.
And it’s not only eyes – his entire face lights up, similar to a child in a toy store. His cheeks go red, even in the blinding light. The biggest grin, with an undertone of shock grows on his face, dimples showing up alongside it, and Penny cannot help but think how similar his and Mischa’s smiles are.
He cautiously raises his hand to wave, and Mischa waves back furiously, grinning widely.
Penny signs “good luck”.
Elijah smiles even more, if that’s possible.
A wave of applause washes through the auditorium, and Penny and Mischa clap until it dies out and the kids start playing.
Elijah keeps looking over to Mischa and Penny even when he’s playing, and the huge grin doesn’t disappear from his face for a moment.
Turns out, Elijah has a duet with a girl. He’s got a duet and he hadn’t said a word about it. No bragging, no excitement, no off-hand mentions. They are the only ones with individual performance, and Elijah didn’t tell them.
They stand in front of everyone, in the bright spotlight. Elijah is fiercely focused on his violin, eyes burning into it as he skillfully plays, and the girl next to him sings beautifully. Elijah’s music and the girl’s voice melt together beautifully, sounding dreamy, like they were made for each other. Penny sees the future of St. Cassian’s choir in bright light.
The concert ends shortly after, and the whole auditorium erupts in loud applause. Mischa even whistles, and she playfully punches him in the arm.
He whistles again.
They walk out to the hall with the other parents. The hall isn’t big, with brown carpet smelling of old, and yellow tapestry with orange stripes, certificates and documents hanging on the walls, lightened by the yellowish light.
Both of them are extremely aware they don’t fit in. Mischa got rid of his backwards cap for the time being, but the way he swayed from side to side, Penny’s stiff stance, and the fact both of them were taller than most of the people in the room didn’t help them fit in. She could feel the way other parents were staring at him.
The mass of kids spills out through the doors and the chaos starts. Kids run around Penny and Mischa trying to find their parents, someone screams practically into Penny’s ear, and she almost gets tripped by some kid running by. The loud buzz increases, as well as the temperature. She shifts her weight from one leg to another and leans into Mischa, who puts an arm around her shoulders.
And then she sees him. Elijah.
He’s standing near the doors, holding the violin case in one hand, the other holding the strap of the backpack on his back, talking to some boy with light blonde hair, also holding a case and laughing.
He turns around, and upon seeing Mischa and Penny forgets about the boy he’s talking to and charges at them. Mischa starts scanding his name in a manner similar to a football chant - "E-LIJAH! E-LI-JAH!" - and Elijah starts waving frantically, pushing people to get the them quicker. Not an easy task, since the hallway is crowded with what seems half of Uranium's population.
Penny opens her arms on instinct and Elijah falls into them without stopping, melting instantly. He’s shivering, but at the same time boiling hot, with sweaty hair at the roots and pink face. So probably from adrenaline.
When he finally tears away, his eyes are shining like never before and the smile is practically permanent on his face. He steps back, though still close enough for another hug.
Mischa immediately pulls him into a side-hug. “You did so well! E-LI-JAH!"/p>
“Thank you.” Elijah sniffles, wiping his nose with the sleeve of his shirt but grins brightly. There is no more Elijah in the very beginning of the concert – there’s the Elijah they know, confident and happy and ready to rant about anything excitedly.
Mischa passes him the bouquet. Elijah holds it, looking at the flowers with adoration, and that’s when Penny notices his hands are trembling terribly.
“For you.”
Elijah looks up at him. “How did you know I like Lilies?”
Mischa shrugs, but there isn’t irritation hidden in his moves. “Sibling intuition.” He really didn’t. Neither of them did, actually, and it’s a pure coincidence they picked them out. “And your solo was so wicked awesome! I am in love with your mad violining skills." Elijah lets out a quick laugh before he pulls Mischa into another hug, careful not to crush the bouquet.
“Why didn’t you tell us?” Mischa quietly asks after a moment.
Elijah pulls off Mischa, hands going in small circles, clearly nervous. “About?” He knows what Mischa asked about.
Mischa looks at her, and Penny knows just what to say. “Your solo and… Everything. We would come.”
He falls silent for a moment, rocking on the soles of his shoes before quickly blurting out. “My parents… They never really could show up for my concerts. Work and all. I’m used to being alone.”
Penny’s heart breaks. How could they? How could they miss so many concerts, so many of Elijah’s achievements so he stopped caring about telling people about them? And how could they bring him to such a state when getting support at a big event made him tear up? How, how, how could they leave him alone and sad and small, all in the name of earning money? It’s not like his family is poor, they’re decently middle-class, surely they could afford one night off.
He’s still so small. He’s still so young. He’s still barely in the double digits, and from the reactions, she can tell it’s been like that for a few good years. How did he felt when he looked into the audience and didn’t see anyone?
“Dude…” Mischa starts, putting one hand on Elijah’s shoulder. He jumps, but quickly falters and puts his head on Mischa’s hand. “You can tell us about these things. We will always, always, I swear on my YouTube channel, show up. At least one of us.”
Penny nods thoughtfully. She can feel the tears pricking at her eyes, and blinks them away, so the mascara doesn't rum down with them. “We are proud of you, Eli. I’m so sorry no one said that before.”
Elijah bursts into tears once again. He tries to wipe them up with the sleeves of his shirt, but he’s quickly enveloped in a hug – Mischa in front of him, Penny in the back – and swayed from side to side as he sobs his eyes out in the hot hallway. He grasps at Mischa’s jacket, gripping the back of it tightly, as tight as he can. He tries to say something, but the hitches and sobs and sniffles successfully make his words incomprehensible.
Penny hears Mischa whispering quietly into Elijah’s hair. “It’s okay. I’ve got you. We’ve got you. You did so well.”
Elijah tries to catch his breath, but the sticky hall air doesn't help. He chokes on his words before whispering out, “I wish you were always here.”
Penny kisses the back of his head and he bits back a sob. “We are. We will.”
They walk to Mischa’s car, still holding each other. Mischa has an arm around Elijah’s shoulders, and Penny’s hand is buried in his hair. Elijah stills hicks from time to time, he keeps shivering, and his eyes are rimmed red. They breathe in the fresh, chilly air, successfully calming down their emotions.
Elijah puts his violin case in the back and calls shotgun before Penny can even blink. Mischa drives, so Penny is forced into the backseat. They talk about the recital, and Elijah shares a few facts from behind the scenes.
He had the worst fight with the boy sitting next to him two days before the recital over said boy chewing gum rather loudly. The boy had to be moved. The girl he had a solo with is named Isabella, and she lives with her parents and older brother on a farm outside Uranium, and she’s a year younger than him. He bought a chocolate bar in the vending machine during one of the rehearsals and half of the kids physically fought it to get it out.
“My dad works in Edmonton, so he only flies home every other weekend, and my mom is on a 24-hour shift in the hospital. It’s always like this.” Elijah says after a moment of quiet. They’re almost at his house, just one minute of driving through rows of colorful one-story houses. There is a hidden bitterness behind his words. No wonder why. “They tell me they will be on the next one, but they never are and I have to ask my friends’ parents to drop me home.”
“You won’t have to call me.” Elijah turns to Mischa, confusion on his face. “I will always be there.”
Elijah exhales through his nose and smiles widely again.
After a moment of silence, Mischa adds, “We’re dragging Ezra to your next recital.”
Penny laughs. “Oh, we so are.”